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August 2004
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October 2004

Double whammy

Nora is crying with a voice full of cold. weeping, bitter confused tears. Why won't I pick her up? Why won't I cuddle her? Why does Mummy keep wanting me to go to bed when all I need is to be wrapped up in her arms?

And so I do. Of course. She's exhausted, and sobbing and it's ridiculous. How on earth can I possibly justify trying to get her to sleep alone in her cot at a time like this.

(It takes two goes. She's asleep right now. I'm praying for her sake that she stays asleep, but she won't. Guaranteed).

...and still no fucking teeth.

Cold, teeth, back, you name it

So today isn't really a good day. It's nowhere near over, even though there's only 3 1/2 hours to go.

My back got - can you believe this - *worse* than it was before. There are a whole plethora of things I can't do at the moment - like standing up from a sitting position, for example. Can you just think about that with added Noras? The pain has decided to switch sides too and is now located in the muscles on the right hand side, middle lower. Thank you. Thank you so much.

Nora, as well as suffering from her teeth has a cold to contend with, which I'm sure is partially tooth related. Her top right tooth has been pretending to be about to break through for about three weeks and is now swelling the gum up red raw. I swear to god I feel like it would be better for Noo if I nicked a hole in the gum myself. The poor wee wench is in a right old state.

And so far, my lovely, snuffly, headachey, feverish girl, after barely eating this lunchtime or tea has woken up twice since she managed to get off to puthery sleep at 7.45 (normally she's asleep before 7).

I forsee a sleepless night ahead for all three of us. I'm praying it's a short cold and I *think* I saw pressure marks on her gum on the right hand side earlier this evening, which might suggest that raw "rosebud" might just be coming. At least, with 1 tooth. I hope so. This whole thing is mean and awful. If it takes this long for her front teeth then help us all when the back ones start threatening.

6 to 8 weeks after the bottom two, my Mum said. Ha!


fillet of salmon. Half an onion, chopped small. Sprinkle of parsley, squish of fresh lemon juice, half a bay leaf, 1 small tomato quartered, small blip of butter.

Put all ingredients on top of the fillet and wrap it all up in foil. Put in a pre-heated (180-ish) oven for 15 minutes. Take out. Scrape off most of the ingredients and put fillet on plate with boiled potatoes and a good solid single taste vegetable (spinach, eg). Rip hole in foil and pour on cooking juices. Eat.

Or, if you are nora, have a nice formula based white sauce (with cooking juices mixed in, no cheese in sauce) poured all over it after Mummy has peeled off the fish skin and mashed the fish up with her fingers.

You have to hand it to Annabelle Carmel sometimes. She loves it.

What not to watch on TV

A programme about very premature babies which includes footage of a baby born at 25 weeks, struggling weakly, obviously in an appallingly traumatised state, suffering internal bleeding and having its life support switched off.

Bit like asking to have your head smashed to pieces with a mallet.

In other news, the UK citizen currently being held captive by psychopathic terrorists in the lawless nightmare that was once Iraq has recorded a video pleading Tony Blair specifically to intervene to help save his life. The captors are the maniacs who saw their victims' heads off whilst they are still alive on video. There is no dout in my mind that this man will be dead in a few days time.

In what way, exactly, is the war over?


Brad DeLong announced this new journal, "The Economists' Voice". I immediately started drooling looking at the immediate editors (Stiglitz, etc), then passed the link on saying "If Paul Krugman was involved, I think I'd keel over in a faint".

(Keels over). He's a regular contributor.

Wahay! Well. Not the greatest intellectual response but nevertheless heartfelt. Expect ill-informed ramblings based on reading this tome on later occasions.

...and meanwhile in the rest of the world

Matt and Fiona got married.

Which was just weird. Why? Because I've known both of them independently for - well, Matt about eight years and Fiona about five. Normally when one goes to a wedding, you've got 1 close friend and their "partner" who in the course of two or three years maybe has gradually got to know everyone. And they're perfectly nice and everything, but they aren't your good good friend right?

Well it's bloody bizarre when they both are.

Big fat grogeous fluffy and slightly gross congratulations to M&F who deserve every happiness and will no doubt embrace life together with the same mad energy they've both got for everything else.

And now, having said that, I must go home to my beloveds and snog both of them.






...all in the space of about 4 days. Weird. You can hear her "voice" much more in these sounds too. Instead of just baby-random yelping and whooopy noises. But she still looks at you and goes "Oooh!" like Kenneth Williams. And laughs like a drain at the cats.

Crawling is the new standing

..Or the new walking, put it that way.

Mizz Noo has discovered to full effect the joyous nature of crawling and she spits on the idea of walking. Standing... standing well that's a different kettle offish altogether. Meanwhile, a pair of goosestepping arms occasionally hides the frantically scrabbling legs which lack any kind of dainty coordination. A grinning face tends to accompany these journeys, generally to rescue a small ball and/or the groovy wooden barrel rattle.

Standing also includes crawling up the bed and standing against the wooden headboard. Unfortunately, standing is VERY EXCITING which means bouncing up and down...

...and bashing your eyebrow on the headboard. Poor munchkin got a lot of kisses this morning. A Lot.

Teeth! for God's sake come!!!

Why do Nora's teeth take so bloody long to come out!

Poor wee monkey - I try hard not to give her pain relief *every bleedin day* but when I don't she's drooling all over the bed, gnashing on her dummy and taking an hour to drift off in to very fitful sleep. The teeth look like they are just literally on the gums and she's all bumpy around the front, so why the hell aren't they COMING OUT!

In other news crawling is now second nature, although standing is still the most interesting thing. Also we have installed the safety gate! however, we will not be a proper baby household until unfortunately we have managed to put all my records in storage and various other "things" to enable a decluttered front room. Damn! Been frantically dumping all my New Order on to CD and wondering what else I should do - The Clash stuff and the B.A.D. Everything else can wait for four years I think (sob).

You may qwell ask why I'm bothering to dump them on to CD ie: a 3rd man where none is really needed. Well yes, except I have a non-convergent household and if you think I've got time (and money) to invest in a convergent one, you are sorely mistaken.

My Mum meanwhile is picking Nora up from Nuresery as we speak and I am STRESSING OUT completely since she hasn't called me to check in, she hasn't got her mobile with her (stupid woman!) and didn't answer the phone at home when I rang it about bloody seven times!!! Argh!!!